A Tech Assessment for the New Year

My patient, a retired teacher, looked embarrassed as he said it.

“I don’t have a smart phone. I don’t have a computer.”

I had to check the readings – somehow, despite this lack of technology in his life, his heart rate was perfectly normal. His oxygen reading was also in the normal range. Skin color looked perfectly healthy. He even wore a smile on his face.

Quickly, trying to keep him from noticing, my brain went into full speed investigation mode.

"How is this medically possible? A human being who is meeting all criteria for being alive, yet he is not connected to technology? Worse yet, he doesn’t seem to carry guilt over this lack of technology, nor does he seem concerned about what he is missing. Should I consult psychiatry? Is this worthy of a case report for the medical literature?"

~~~~~~~~~

One of the gifts we get with each new year is the chance to reassess what we want to invest our time and energy into doing.

This includes technology, and more specifically the screens that humans are more and more likely to be staring at in the check-out line, as they drive, and in any moment of pause in their day. (My mom shared how in her choir practice yesterday, it was odd to her that people didn’t connect with each other during the breaks but rather pulled out their 2x4 inch screens to “connect”.)

A list of questions that I encourage all of us to sit with. You might even write them down on paper using ink.

How much of my life energy do I want consumed by and lived through screens (phone, computer, tablet, TV, etc.) in 2023?

What is the healthy amount of consumption and living that I want to do through these devices this year? (Is there someone in my life that I feel models this healthy level of consumption? What is their strategy?)

What is being squeezed out of my life by these devices?

Am I missing things on a moment-to-moment and day-to-day basis because of these devices? If so, what am I missing?

If my phone was at 0% battery but I was at 100% at this moment, would I be content?

If I had horrible food but a phone in my hand, would I consider the meal a success?

Am I more connected or disconnected to myself and those around me because of technology?

For those with children, how is my house doing at dealing with the above questions, in theory and in practice?

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Assuming we identify places and ways we want to invest differently than the course we are currently on related to our screens and devices, it is a great chance to make some changes for your year ahead. 

Put a basket in your house entrance where phones are to be placed as you walk in. 

Take a day a week that is screen free for the entire family. 

Work actively to take control of your technology (starting with the phones we call "smart") as opposed to the other way around.

You might even channel my patient’s smile and contentment with his low-tech life. Again, if you can trust me on this as a medical professional, he seemed to be doing quite fine.

Celebrate the Losses of 2022

The game came down to the last seconds.

Down by three, we scored on a layup. Now a 1-point game. And then, it was over. A narrow 1-point loss in the championship game for our middle school boys team.

One started crying, then another. It caught on like something infectious and suddenly parents were tearing up as well. As one of the coaches for the team, I wondered what we could have done differently. I questioned what coaching decisions we could have made that would have changed the outcome.

I also realized the incredible opportunity that losing gives us. In middle-school basketball. In life.

It was only with the loss that we saw how much the players really cared about each other and their team. I had never seen middle school boys hug like that!

The following day, I had another realization. The two teams were basically equal, as evidenced by the final score. However, the winning team, trophy in hand, walks away with very little introspection about how they can improve. Human nature is such that when we win, we don’t think that way.

On the other side, our team is a group of coaches and players asking what we did wrong, what we would do different, and how we can get better. There is a fire to become a better player/coach thanks to the 1-point differential where we were on the losing side.

It is a gift that comes with our losses – the desire to learn how we can improve and grow.

I share this today, as we naturally turn toward the year that was and look at what we learned. Celebrate the wins of 2022, absolutely. But take some time to look at the losses as well, as that is where the gifts of learning and growth are to be found. Take time to dissect how losses this year have made you a better person. You may discover a few losses that were so painful that you never took the time to see how you could use them for a positive purpose; if so, do that now.

A simple exercise you can try as well:

1        * List 3 important losses from 2022

          * As you look at these together, now write about what these losses have taught you and how they make you a stronger, better person.

Happy holidays to everyone!

                                                In health,

                                                (Proud) Losing Coach Anthony

50k Wisdom

I had the chance to run for hours and hours this past weekend in one of my favorite places on earth, the Bosque of our beautiful Albuquerque. I actually paid money to do a 50 kilometer race. Probably sounds crazy to many of you, and I would agree that it is.

You have a lot of time to talk with yourself in 30+ miles of trail running, and I reflect that a lot of this banter is actually filled with life wisdom. So, I have a few of the thoughts that were a part of my conversation in those hours below.

I hope they provide meaning and inspiration. I hope they raise some good questions for you.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Feeling down? High-five someone else.

Feeling depleted? Keep moving. You might feel better in an hour.

Feeling tired? Set your sight on what is directly ahead and don’t worry about anything else. (By the way, what did you expect when you signed up for this?? To not feel tired?? End of conversation.)

Want to quit? Okay, go for it. But what does that accomplish? Will you be happy with that decision tomorrow?

Each of us has our own race to run.

Forget about winning or losing, and instead focus on digging for the best effort you can give.

Smile often. Embrace the beauty, the misery, and all in between.

Run for those who can’t.

Time is meaningless. How we spent the time is what matters (Feels strange to write that one as a competitive runner. What if there was a way at the finish to determine who enjoyed themselves the most out on the course, and that determined the winner, not who finished first)

When your mind tells you “Let’s walk” gently tell it back “Let’s run”

A pic of my amazing family who came out to support me in the endeavor

Gratitude

Appreciation

beckons

colorful harmony

gratitude’s song

                                2

                                                wave

                                                waft

                                                thru

                                                heart

                                                strings

notes

        2

notice

                                                gifts

                                                grandeur

                                                given

                                                daily

Today’s gift,

the

present

                        presents

                        precisely

what we need but cannot buy or hoard or capture on Snapchat

 

            Presence

            in the

            Present

            is the

                        Present

                                                            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This week, allow life to slow amidst the food and gatherings, that 

gratitude fills the space you have created.

The Leaf's Journey

“Change is not about loss. Change is about growth.”

That statement was gifted to me recently, amidst the trees doing their beautiful fall thing, changing with vibrant grace.

The leaf worked so hard to emerge six months ago, a green sprout of life painted onto a colorless canvas that was emerging from winter’s grasp.

That same leaf worked day after day to absorb sunlight. It was proud carrier of chlorophyll that photosynthesized tirelessly to bring life to the tree.

Now, with mysterious cues from nature, it has begun their leaf journey to fall from the branch they have so bonded with. But not before a brilliant splash of yellow/orange/red graces their surface, a farewell parting gift to us all.

The leaf is put in a precarious position, is it not? Here it had purpose, life-sustaining reason for being. It had a community of leaves that it had become accustomed to seeing each day. It had a branch with whom a symbiotic bond was formed. Now, with the right wind at the right angle, it is at risk of falling into uncertainty. Doest the leaf shake with fear at the thought?

Change is not about loss. Change is about growth.

The leaf we see falling as we pass through its path is guiding and teaching us. It knows that it is time to fall from branch and tree, its community for the last months. The leaf knows that their self-identity as a photosynthesizer must evolve into now giving in a different way.

First, by allowing the right wind at the right angle to lift it gently by the stem so that it may journey toward Mother Earth.

It shouts with joy as it flutters and flips downward.

Through this humbling journey will it realize its growth into an element that can magically give life anew. As it finds a gentle resting spot upon the ground, it sighs and can finally relax after months of hard work.

It’s job is now is to rest and allow nature to decompose its energy into new life.

Humans call the leaf at this stage “fertilizer”.

The leaf smiles back.

It prefers to call this next phase “life reimagined”.

The Centennial Edition!

For blog #100, I asked readers to share what writing to heal means to them in 100 words or less. Thank you Lindy, Jerome and Kim. Your words are a gift to all of us! And thank you to every person who has supported this journey, and in that support, who has supported me. 

I coupled the words below with a musical piece, "Weaving" by Connor Chee. I recommend playing his piece while you read the words below.

~~~~~~~~~~

Writing to Heal to me means writing from the soul.  Journaling is

a way to cope,

a way to address sorrow

a way to remember joy

a way to focus on wonderful memories and ongoing love. 

Without journaling, some of these thoughts would stay locked inside and perhaps overlooked, forgotten or even repressed. 

Writing to heal is indeed that; a process the involves healing and growing with new strengths discovered.

~~~~~~~~~~

Writing to Heal means finding whichever artistic medium speaks to us and using it to uncover and understand the truths of the world. If we all took the time to do this in a genuine way geared towards discovery and growth, we could end up healthier and happier as a society. Much of the division around is comes from each person living in their own silo of self-truth and we often forget to truly listen and empathize with the others who have different views.

 

My challenge to myself and all of us… 

Let’s listen to each other in a non-judgmental way.

Let’s accept that diversity of viewpoints is actually an asset and we don’t need to convince everyone to think like we do.  

In this same direction, we can use writing and the various arts as ways to express, share and grow together. 

 ~~~~~~~~~~

Writing to heal provides a moment to reflect on current events without biased judgement, to focus on amazingly strong individuals and their contributions to our society.

Writing to heal is a reminder that humanity can be about love, compassion and respect, or simply the quiet reflection on movement or nature and the lessons we learn from all of this.

Writing to heal reminds me of the good that remains in this world and that I am part of a beautiful larger community.

 ~~~~~~~~~~

writing

2

heal all that ails mind, soul, and spirit.

one pen-stroke at a time

we place words gently upon a paper, a simple act

of love

of resilience

of testifying

“I am”

“We are”

“Beauty is restored”

Life wisdom from the tomato garden

I needed a moment of quiet, and thus found myself in our garden amidst cherry tomato madness.

I picked, ate a few, put a few others into bowls.

I listened to what the tomato garden has to teach us - here is what I heard:

Life is more abundant than we give it credit for.

Life is calmer and quieter than we notice.

Nature is never in a hurry, yet everything is accomplished. (Tomatoes helped me remember this one from Lao Tzu).

Even when you think there is nothing left to harvest, there are always hidden treasures just out of view.

Sweetness from the vine speaks to the soul (in a way that processed foods/sugars do not).

It's not how many you pick, but how fully you appreciate the moments spent picking.

The strong smell of the tomato vine and bites from the mosquitos can distract our gaze from the fruit of life. Maybe they are there to strengthen our resolve...

Even if a few accidentally fall into your mouth, instead of into the bowl you were sent outside to fill, no one needs to know. (Wipe your mouth before going inside)

We meticulously prepare things as rectangular raised beds, but life grows un-deterred around such arbitrary confines. How we respond to this beautiful chaos, not how well we made the raised beds, determines our ability to embrace life’s gifts.

Our raised beds are barely visible amidst tomato madness

Finally, a few bits of wisdom offered by my each of my children, when asked what they think the garden teaches us:

If they don’t come off easily, that means they aren’t ready.

The green ones are sour.

You will never always get the one you most want the first time.

There is always more.