Awe

 

“It’s as big as the whole world!”

-          Carolyn, age 5

 

Watching fireworks with our niece, Carolyn, we heard her shout this as a very large firework exploded in the sky above Laguna Pueblo.

The awe of a young child is a wonderful thing.

A teaching moment, really.

I saw the same firework as it took over the sky. But I didn’t feel the sense of awe that she did. I suspect that my children, who are older than Carolyn, might not have felt awe either.

Awe (noun) : a feeling of reverential respect mixed with fear or wonder

: the rapt attention and deep emotion caused by the sight of something extraordinary

Awe (verb) : to inspire or fill with awe

Synonyms for awe : wonderment, astonishment, amazement, wonder

 

So, how do we channel a young child’s ability to feel awe in ways that we don’t?

First, we might do well to practice a bit. It might come naturally to the Carolyns of the world, while for the rest of us it will take some work and effort toward being awed, toward feeling awe.

In thinking about this for myself, being fully present might be one of the ways to improve my “awe muscle”. Being less distracted, less rushed. Being present so that the firework and its glow and bigness are not missed.

Second, we might practice gratitude as I think it is a necessary component of awe. It is the glucose that feeds the awe muscle to be able to contract. Gratitude, of course, has little to do with what is happening around us, or in the sky above in the case of fireworks. It has everything to do with what is happening inside us, with the heart and mind that is receiving and interpreting those things happening around us.

Finally, maybe what Carolyn does in the moment that the firework booms and blooms overhead is to simply suspend reality and rational thinking in order to flex the awe muscle. Allowing ourselves to go to a playful, youthful place where we are allowed to live in fantasy for a few moments. In the case of the fireworks, things like,

“How did they fit all of those colors into such a small firework?

“What if that firework was actually light-up gummy bears and I could open my mouth to catch a few?”

“It’s as big as the whole world!”

 

Have fun flexing the awe muscle, good people.

Channel the inner-child as you work on it.

Work on being present, increasing your gratitude dose and inviting play and fantasy into your world.

Our teacher, Carolyn, will be proud of our efforts.

Juneteenth

In the car on Friday, my children asked me what Juneteenth meant.

I started by explaining the historical facts as I know them. 900 days after the signing of the Emancipation Proclamation January 1, 1863, Union troops arrived in Galveston, TX at the end of the Civil War June 19^th. 1865. Major General Gordon Granger read General Orders No. 3, which finally informed the 250,000 enslaved people in Texas that they were free.

This moment did not immediately change the conditions for the formerly enslaved, and many became sharecroppers for the former slave owners. History Professor Erin Stewart Mauldin reminds, “Individuals had to fight for every piece of freedom they experienced and the struggle for justice that started long before the war did not end with emancipation.”

The moment, I remind myself, was my great-great grandfather’s generation. Four generations before me. Not long ago.

I paused and checked in with my children.

Juneteenth is a moment to be honest about our country’s history. Not to sugarcoat it, not to erase it, but to embrace the ugly, the horrific parts of our country.

Juneteenth is a moment to re-commit ourselves to standing with and for those being erased in this moment – peoples of color, LGBTQ+, women, the poor. It is a reminder that shackles remain on too many in 2026.

Juneteenth is a moment to stand for science and the planet at a moment when powerful voices tell us neither are worth standing up for.

Juneteenth is a moment where we can love our country and at the same time be deeply disturbed over what our country has become and is becoming.

Juneteenth begs for a patriotism that sees that while slavery ended, our nation has never been emancipated from the racism that led to slavery and the genocide of Indigenous peoples.

Juneteenth pleads for us not to celebrate our 250^th in blind, flag-waving, amnesia, singing “America the Beautiful” but rather to see our country for the traumatized, flawed entity that it is. It asks us to continue working for political and economic freedom for all peoples, driven by a hope and belief that America can be beautiful yet.

Creating Community

There are days when I am saddened by the impersonal, self-centered, disconnected world we have created. With AI, and our inability to tell whether the person answering the phone or email is a human or a bot, it will only get more challenging.

On my walks and runs, I am now often greeted by “Hello” and turn my head in excitement, only to realize it is someone’s security system saying to all passer-by’s “Hello, you are being recorded.”

Not exactly the best way to build community, huh?

But, I also see the other side.

My neighbor Cathi whose chickens lay nice eggs that I then buy from her.

My neighbor Roger who sprinkled us with water from the hose on a recent run by his house.

My neighbors Tim and Jessica who let me pick fruit from their trees.

The Sanchez family who actually thank me for picking their cherries. “It should be me thanking you,” I always respond.

The folks with amazing grapes along the ditch who came out to see what I was doing, and instead of yelling at me, offered me bags to collect the grapes in.

[Yes, I really love picking fruit. “I am a forager, not a grower,” I tell folks.]

And then there was the recent visit to Gyros Mediterranean where they insisted on some baklava on the house just because I coached the owner’s daughter.

[Yes, the larger theme here is that Anthony loves free food]

And in my recent health challenges, the multitude of people who have showered my family and me with kindness on a daily basis.

So, as I take it all in, here are my thoughts:

If we value community, we have to do the work to create it.  Contributing to and serving our relatives, our neighbors, and even the strangers in our midst. Receiving from them in return.

Increasingly, this requires us to go against the grain of tech-infatuated society. It requires us to resist tantalizing things offered to us, always with a promise of making our life easier. Yes, but at what cost? And is the easy life a fulfilled one?

And for those who read these words and feel the same frustration I feel when tricked by the electronic security systems offering me a threatening “hello”, maybe the key to creating community is closer and simpler than you think.

Maybe it is going to say hello to the new person who just moved in down the street.

Maybe it is offering some fruit to a passer-by.

Maybe it is the random act of kindness for a loved one that you are going to do today.

Love to each of you this Monday!

And momma, a very happy birthday to you today. You are an amazing guiding light in my life. Everything I write and do is a reflection of you.

Graduation Day!

Nizhoni,

This is daddy here, writing to tell you how proud mom and me and all of these people reading this blog are of you.

You are crossing the stage this evening and will become a graduate of Albuquerque High School. You will soon enter into the next chapter in your education at Colorado University-Boulder. Ayani' (buffalo) is a sacred animal and as the mascot of CU-Boulder, you are in good hands. Thanks for not choosing a school too far away.

I am really proud of who you are as a young Dine' woman, a person with high morals and faith. You are a go-getter, and have excelled in many arenas during these last years. I expect even more flowers to blossom in these years ahead.

But really? You are already graduating? Why so soon?

You arrived 2 months into Shannon and me moving across the country to start life in New Mexico. I was a resident and would make sure to have you and momma up for dinner each evening on my 30 hour shifts, knowing that it would brighten all of our days.

I love you Nizhoni. Ayo'nishnii. 

Continue to walk that beautiful path toward Allah/Creator in humility, with gratitude, and full of joy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For everyone who has helped raise our daughter, as it takes a village and you are that village, a huge hug to each of you. And if you are also celebrating a graduate this season, I hope Shannon and I have been that same support for your child's journey.

p.s. I think back to another blog I once curated of my 1st experiences with you. Sorry in advance for any embarrassment these pics might cause. Not really - they are worth sharing.

https://nizhonirose.blogspot.com/2008/

Joy

 

Joy walked into the exam room today.

More of a run, actually.

Gave me a big hug.

And let me listen to her big girl heart.

Forgotten were my worries, fears and anxieties.

No longer was the mental “to-do” list playing over and over.

Regrets from yesterday and worries about tomorrow evaporated.

Joy took over and I succumbed.

I played and did silly 3-year-old things.

I don’t regret a moment of it.

 

Has joy knocked on your door yet today?

And when she does, will you answer it?

Push aside yesterday and let go of tomorrow.

Let joy be your today.

Lucca and Ben, thank you for bringing joy to me in the form of your daughter Noemi. 

And to Noemi, keeping radiating that joy for the world to see and feel.

Weaving

at the footsteps of her journey 

into rug’s world and life’s magic

offering prayer

shouting “Stoodis”

she

pulls

tugs

straightens

pushes

pulls

combs

tightens

weaving 

              beauty

  healing

  love

 into existence

and so it is.

and so it was.

and so it shall be.

A piece inspired by Connor Chee's "Weaving" video starring weaver Ramona Keoni. Mr. Chee is a classical pianist who has Indigenized this form of music. He will take traditional Dine' songs and make them into classical pieces. 

I invite you to watch the video today and write your own piece, with words/song/prayer/etc. By the way "Stoodis" is Native slang for "Let's do this."

Random Acts of Kindness Day

I proclaim today as the Random Acts of Kindness Day.

May you be on the receiving end of at least one.

But, alas, we are less in control of that, right? Beyond being vigilant not to miss those gifts, we can’t really control what others will do for us.

May you be on the giving end of a multitude of random acts of kindness this fine, beautiful day.

This one, my friends, is absolutely in our control.

Open that door for the stranger.

Go out of your way to gift something to a cashier, a bank teller, someone panhandling, etc.

Put good energy toward a friend who is struggling. And add all of those struggling to your wish before your blow it into the wind.

Warning: Side effects to giving random acts of kindness may include joy, connection, high levels of oxytocin, big smiles.

Talk to your doctor if you feel that such gifting may pose a serious threat to your health. (Ahh, Dr. Fleg has reviewed your files and finds you to be in perfect shape for giving today.)

And my friends, I would be remiss if I did not include a reminder that on today, random acts of kindness toward yourself are required as well.

Take a few moments to rejuvinate amidst the chaos.

Take time to center in the present, to bask in “what is” and let “what was” and “what might come to be” quietly recede.

Enjoy receiving and giving today!