2 AM in the hospital

Eerie silence + stillness

Patients weary, needing their rest

The machines rumble a low hum while their alarms scream for no apparent reason.

(I often wonder if maybe the alarms are there solely to keep the night nurses and techs awake)

(and annoyed)

 

There is a sacredness to 2 AM in the hospital

You feel the deep sighs of patients trying to heal

Their dreams must revolve around how they will talk their way to a discharge the next morning.

Freedom to return to their own beds and kitchens and bathrooms and routines

 

In the calm of 2 AM in the hospital

The broken healthcare system even seems okay for a moment

 

I stand at a window, staring out at the darkness beyond.

I ask for strength as eyelids have become heavy.

I give thanks for this moment, 2 AM in the hospital

 

[Selfish Stanza]

I am soooo tired.

I see that ER room #7 is empty. Would anyone notice if I snuck in and just laid down for a few?

I wish I were a coffee drinker right now.

Where did I go wrong in life 

that here I am at 

2 AM in the hospital?

Yerba Mansa Wonderland

as I scuttle along the Bosque trail,

east of the river,

south of the city,

the noise and distraction of life and Cesar Chavez Blvd recede.

 

my          bigness becomes smallness

               beneath

               grandmother and grandfather Cottonwoods.

the           river hums away

    carrying away all that does not serve

    a constant in a world of chaos.

 

suddenly, the landscape

    abruptly

    amazingly

    beautifully

    becomes a meadow of our medicinal relative, Yerba Mansa.

 

it is the Disneyland of the Bosque.

it is paradise.

it is heaven.

it is stillness.

it is abundance

it is healing.

we give thanks.

 

Yerba Mansa moves earth and takes care of stagnation, aerating the soil for other plants to grow roots.

in our bodies, it also addresses stagnation, acting as diuretic for the kidneys, as expectorant for the lungs.

Acting as energetic diuretic and spiritual expectorant as well

coaxing into motion

things that need to move on

places that need to move again

 

How and why this patch is abruptly, amazingly, beautifully there, I am not sure.

The historian’s theory: As Yerba Mansa tea was a mainstay of the Tuberculosis treatments in this desert climate that promised to heal those with the disease, maybe it was planted by hands human.

The biologist’s theory: Water table below is quite shallow at this spot, with enough shade from Cottonwoods above.

My response: I have no idea “how” it came to be, and am not too worried about finding the answer. I am very much excited by the question of “how” this Yerba Mansa patch brings me and all who visit its embrace to a place beautiful.

It lovingly reminds us to care for the earth that it (and all of us) need to grow, to protect the water that feeds it and all of us.

we give thanks.

scuttling further south after basking in Yerba Mansa,

suddenly, the landscape

abruptly

amazingly

beautifully

returns to the Bosque normal, not a single Yerba Mansa plant to be found.

here, I find that my heart gives thanks the loudest.

 

Directions for those who wish to visit for themselves: Park at National Hispanic Cultural Center and enter the Bosque, heading south. The Yerba Mansa patch is 0.75 miles south of Cesar Chavez Blvd. You cannot miss it. Peak bloom (early to middle of June), but like Disneyland, it is magical 365 days a year. Pro tip #1 – bring friends/family, as it will enhance the experience. Pro tip #2 - rub your hands in the soil right at the stalk of the plant to get the oils from the plant. Pro tip #3 - let gratitude overwhelm you.

The Journey Continues

As I get ready to release the 2^nd Writing to Heal book this Saturday, I think back to where it all began.

A few of you may remember emails with a word document attached in the first weeks of the pandemic. “A Gratitude Perspective on Coronavirus”, a piece inspired by my oldest daughter, began the Writing to Heal Journey. I felt that words were needed in a moment where COVID left us all speechless. I trusted that I could heal myself through those words. I trusted that as I healed myself, I could bring others along for the journey as well.

From word documents, it became a blog. And with the blog, a community.

And from the blog, a book emerged in 2022.

That one was focused on healing from the pandemic. COVID was a co-author of sorts, providing the impetus for me to write, providing the gaping hole in our lives from which healing was needed.

This time around, Writing to Heal: The Journey Continues is about re-emergence. It is about the next stage of life and healing that follows a traumatic period. Journeys are filled with valleys and peaks. Struggles alongside triumph. It is not that we re-emerge from the pandemic with an easier life, but that we re-emerge with a sense that we have learned something about the life journey from what we have endured.

A little about the book.

It is a collection of art, poetry, and reflections on social justice, movement, and nature. My children each have pieces in this one.

I hope it will feed and nourish those who peek into its pages.

We also recorded an audio version of the book, with a link to this in the book itself. We plan to release it as an audiobook on Kindle and other platforms this fall.

As we head into the holiday weekend, the journey continues. May we continue our re-emergence journey with joy and resilience, guided by love and gratitude.

I look forward to seeing you at one of the book launch events this next week!

Post-Sabbatical Musings

Good morning, good people.

Now about six weeks back from sabbatical, I thought I would take a few minutes to write to the question many have asked since I returned to work:

“What life lessons did you learn during your time away?”

I recognize that it is an incredible privilege to have the ability to step away from work, something that many of my colleagues at UNM and almost none of the healthcare workforce outside of academia get to experience. It is not lost on me that in my clinic of nurses, medical assistants, pharmacists, social workers, community health workers, PAs, NPs, and MDs only the last group (MDs) are even eligible for sabbatical. That’s about 8 of us, with another 50 people who make up the other groups in the clinic.

Okay, deep breath.

It is admittedly daunting to answer the question above, and I tend to do what I just did here – sneakily avoid answering the question. It feels like I am expected to have something profound, so much so that the lights will flicker and the person will have a vision of The Hereafter just because of what I have shared.

Ignoring that pressure, here goes.

 

Lesson #1: I am much more in control of how busy life gets that I like to acknowledge

My wife has commented that during my sabbatical it didn’t seem to her that my work schedule or commitments was that different than when I am working. I noticed this as well. I have a tendency to fill each day with lots of things, and sabbatical just meant that I got a bit more options in how to fill the day. So, if even 6 months off work didn’t allow me to slow down in a real way, obviously the issue lies with me, not with life beyond, my job, etc.

Reflection: Take a quick glimpse of your schedule for today and the rest of the week. Is there a healthy amount of time for you to decompress, to breathe deep, to practice self-care in your schedule? If not, own your part in making it so. But also take the opportunity to edit, delete, and add as needed.

 

Lesson #2: There is a volume nob on the noise in life. I need to use it.

For astute blog readers, you will remember this came up in my piece about the labyrinth. A very simple but important realization for me that noise – those things that distract us from being our best self – is something I can choose to turn up or down. An example of how I am now working to actively manage the volume button: I decided during the sabbatical to turn off sports talk radio as the thing I listen to before bed. My wife refers to this form of media as “male gossip” and I think she is right on. Not that it is harmful, but it is noise. And by replacing it with silence before bed, it allows me to settle into sleep in a much better way.

Reflection: Take a few moments today to list a few of the “loudest” sources of noise in your life at the moment. Now, circle items on the list that you have some or total control of, in terms of how loud they are. Pick one that you have circled and come up with a plan for the next week of how you could gently (or drastically) turn the volume down on that noise source.

 

Lesson #3: Play is really important for me and my health

It is no coincidence that I began to write on the topic of play and its importance for our health as adults during my 6 months of play that was sabbatical. It wasn’t on my list of things to do when I went on sabbatical, but it naturally became something that I began to think and write about. I even wrote a piece with a colleague on how we can incorporate play into clinic visits and our treatment plans. (A few of our meetings for the paper involved a conversation while playing ping pong).

I think the simplest way that I have found to capture the essence of play is this: the point of playing is not to win, but to play. I realize that most of life is set up for us to have a goal-oriented reason for each task, and when it comes to sports and games, we still focus on winning as the goal.

I like the example that dogs give us in this realm – imagine a Chihuahua and Pit Bull sniffing each other out at the dog park. 5 lbs (on a good day) vs. 90 lbs. And then they begin to play. Despite the massive size discrepancy, you realize a few minutes later that they are still playing. The bigger dog is lying on its back letting the little one throw some jabs. The dogs realize that the point of the game is not to win, but to keep the game going.

Reflection: How are you playing currently in life? Do you wish you played more? Are there activities you currently do that could be enhanced by focusing more on the play itself, as opposed to making them goal-oriented or about winning? Are there new forms of play that you want to explore? Play with this one!

Not surprisingly, when I googled images of "play", there were only images of children that came up. But Bluey's dad is a great example of a playful adult. So here's a nod to Australian PBS. Watch an episode if you haven't already.

Dine' Diva

full of self-love

filled with Beautyway energy

finding comfort in her own skin

she

tied

tsiiyeel

tired of

trying to be anything

                    anyone

                        but the Naadaa ligai Naasht’ezhi

                                      born for Tl’zllani’

                                      Dine’ Diva she is

                        the manifestation of Ancestors

dreams +

prayers +

sweat +

resilience

full

filled

finding

she

tied

tsiiyeel

trembling

                        seeing herself

                        for

                        the

                        first

                        time

This piece is one of my collaborative projects with Crystal Daghaaii (aka Bishdo), with her visual art inspiring my poetic art and vice versa. I love this Indigenous pride and self-confidence in this Bishdo piece, evident in all of her work. You can see and support her art here.  

My second book, Writing to Heal: The Journey Continues, will include this collaborative piece. Our book launch party is exactly one month away, July 5th. Stay tuned for details!

Labyrinth Wisdom

When you step into a labyrinth,

Even the air that hovers above is different.

Still and fresh,

it fills

heart and lungs

with renewal.

Pumping and respiring

Arteries and alveoli

Vigorously awakened

Alert and alive  

 

The labyrinth has much to teach:

Trust in the path before you.

Don’t look too far ahead.

 

Narrow confines are there not to constrict, but to embrace, your journey

 

Solitary can also be communal

Communal can also be solitary

 

The noise in life comes with a volume button: we just have to use it

The beauty in life also comes with a volume button: we just have to use it

 

I had a wonderful invitation from Peter and Deirdre to visit a labyrinth in the Bosque recently. I was curious, as the location they described was within a few strides of trails that I frequently run. They guided me to the location. The noise of I-40 rumbled in the background, but suddenly seemed far away. I played with the volume nob like a toddler, excited to see that I could attenuate (toddler speak for "change") the noise level. 

I was amazed at this gem that I had never seen despite its proximity to where I move. How had I missed it all these years? Life is often like that – we scurry past the “gems” at a speed that makes it easy to miss them.

It also struck me, as I labyrinthed with them, to be open to new insights and learning even with things we feel confident that we know well. Here was a patch of earth that I run more than just about any other, with only 100 yards of Bosque between river and acequia and yet I had no idea the labyrinth existed.

Peter and Deirdre, thank you for the adventure and learning! Labyrinth on!

Norty

A few weeks ago, I had a chance to sit with a dear mentor of mine, Dr. Norty Kalishman.

Norty is one of those people who has done it all – protested injustices, sat on non-profit boards, helped to lead a charitable foundation and lots of things he probably hasn’t told me about. He did all of this while serving his communities as a primary care physician, including a stint where helped lead the New Mexico Department of Health. 

These days, he balances all of the activism with retirement, enjoying life with his wife Summers, gardening, and being an amazing grandparent.

But it was something he asked at the end of the meeting, a seemingly inconsequential question, that caught me off guard.

“Should I send things to your AMSA email?”

I paused in hearing this. Stunned, to be honest.

AMSA stands for the American Medical Student Association, and I was a student leader in AMSA in 2007, trying to address the troubling presence of for-profit interests (e.g. drug companies) in medical education. They even gave me an AMSA email. (Hey, as a medical student, small gifts like this are amazing, as you try to tread water and stay afloat.)

I hadn’t heard those letters in a long time.

That question made me realize how long Norty had been in my life, encouraging and guiding me.

In fact, I recall now that when I came to Albuquerque as an east coast medical student in 2007, a UNM student had given me a few names of community-oriented, radical, activist physicians that I needed to meet.

Norty, meeting all of the above criteria, was on this short list. He had literally helped to welcome me to Burque and this Enchanted Land.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As life speeds ahead, often at a dizzying pace, it can be a sort of amnesia, making it hard to remember the people who have poured into us over years and decades.

Surely, you have people like Norty in your life. 

Take a few moments this week to reflect on the people who have guided your path. Write one of them a letter, give one of them a call, and if they are no longer walking in this life with us, remember them in a way that is meaningful. Let your Nortys know that you are grateful for them.

Norty, thank you for asking the question, and in doing so, helping me to remember. 

Thank you for guiding me these last two decades. 

Thank you for unconditional love and friendship. 

I hope to be like you when I grow up.

p.s. I will share an editorial he co-authored in March on child well-being. Click here

Life's Overwhelming Beauty

Beauty, y’all

    Man, sometimes we look at the vast expanse.

    It’s sort of hard to take it all in.

    It can be intimidating.

    Scary, looking at these depths

It’s also the first moment of seeing the Colorado River after some good hard work to get here.

 

And you also see

You have boulders

Things to hang on to

Things to give you

Shade

Protection

Your loved ones

Creator

It has become an annual ritual for me - running long runs in the Grandest of Canyons, a time to pray and give thanks. I enjoy taking a moment to record something short in the moment, filled with the energy of this magical place and the energy of the movement.

If you want to view the previous years' posts, here they are:

2024: Appreciating the Journey (+ Ourselves) - click here.

2022: Moving from Shade to Sun - click here.

Restorative Practices: Interview with my son

 

Repairing and Forgiveness by Aliana Garcia, 7th Grader at Garfield STEM and Community School. She explains, "This picture represents harm and forgiveness. You have to repair what has happened... Sometimes kids lose friends and sometimes they just need to talk."

I had the chance to interview an important person yesterday.

He happens to be my son.

Bah’Hozhooni is an 8^th grader who is beginning to see his abilities as a leader and his responsibilities to others. Garfield STEM and Community School, nestled in the North Valley, is an incubator for young leaders. The school has made a strong shift to restorative practices in the last years, with a focus “repairing relationships and building stronger communities by prioritizing dialogue and harm repair, rather than punishment, in conflict resolution.”

In doing so, Garfield has gone from a school with notoriously high rates of expelled and suspended students to a school where such actions are almost non-existent. But it is not a top-down approach. Garfield empowers Bah’Hozhooni and his peers to become a part of the restorative culture and practices. They allow students to pick peers who they feel are trustable and these students become “Circle Keepers” who lead restorative circles for their peers. Ms. Erin Chavez leads Circle Keepers trainings on a weekly basis after school.  

Recently, the Circle Keepers got the chance to set up an art exhibit at the UNM School of Education, presenting to future teachers about their work and leading restorative circles. My son and his peers are now college professors!

Here was my interview with the professor:

Q: Tell us about the Circle Keeper program at Garfield Middle School and why you said "yes" to being a part of this group.

Bah'Hoozhoni: The circle keeper program is a group of trusted students that help the school internally. We go over restorative justice and practices, as well as suicide prevention. I didn’t really say yes, but I got put into the advisory class and decided to try it out. 

Q: What things are Circle Keepers trained in?

B: Circle keepers are trained and certified in suicide prevention and restorative practices

Q: What do you think are the biggest ways Circle Keepers and Restorative Practices improve your school?

B: Circle Keepers and Restorative Practices help make the school feel more safe and friendly. We also help improve the overall wellbeing of the students’ minds.

Q: I know you have mentioned the school-to-prison pipeline. What is this and how is your school working to meet this challenge?

B: The school-to-prison pipeline is when students get in trouble and are usually met with a consequence. Usually this consequence is being suspended which can cause students to feel not valuable. This then can cause them to be related in the criminal justice system, especially boys, of color or with disabilities. We as Circle Keepers are trying to keep them away from being suspended and feeling like they are worth something. 

Q: Last question: How do you want to continue using what you have learned as you enter high school?

B: Of course, I would love to continue this great work Ms. Chavez has put into our group and given the knowledge I know, it’s very possible I will see this at my high school next year.

~~~~~~~~~

My son, I am proud of you. I am excited to see how you bring your Circle Keeper knowledge to your next school and into your next years.

To Garfield’s teachers and administration, thank you for giving students a new lens for seeing how they can live in and repair the world.

To all my readers, get over to Hokona Hall on UNM's main campus to see the art exhibit of the amazing Garfield artists. It is up until the end of May.

Togetherness by Lalaine Chavez and Daymian Lovato. They describe, "In the artwork you can see the globe with people on it and on the land patches there are affirmations. The earth is being held by hands with hearts in the background. We chose this topic because we wanted to show how self-love and togetherness are important...self-love is important for your mental health. Our hope for all students and educators is that they will be more aware of people's feelings and help each other out when needed.

Living with Peace by Bah'Hozhooni Fleg and Lucas Sarabia. They explain, "In the artwork you can see nature and beautiful art. There is negative stuff like guns and drugs. They go down to a beautiful waterfall and get turned into peace, love and a flower. Along the border are also the 6 R's of restorative practices. At our school, we have experienced the 6 R's as Circle Keepers as we need to be responsible and respect our peers.

 

Tuesday!

Good morning, good people.

Tuesday has come to be.

A gift that Monday could not promise.

And Tuesday, being a bit selfish, frowns upon us worrying about her sister, Wednesday.

“Stay right here, 

        in this day, 

                in this moment, 

                        in the present that is the present,” she implores.

Tuesday.

What will you make with this opportunity?

If you arrive at Tuesday with a cup close to empty, today is the time to fill that cup. How will you do this? 

Start with a few moments of quiet, a chance to strategize and prioritize how you will fill the cup. 

You deserve this. 

Tuesday has gifted you this opportunity. 

Take her up on that offer to begin filling the cup.

If you arrive at Tuesday with a cup overflowing, celebrate that. Today is the perfect time to share a few drops with those around you.

As I plan my celebratory dance with Tuesday myself, I think of an India Arie song, “Give Thanks”.

“There will never ever be another day just like this day.”

True. Tuesday offers us what no other day in our lives will offer.

She continues,

“So let’s give praise now.”

Enjoy your dance with Tuesday, good people.

Movement is the Song of the Body

If

movement is the song of the body,

what song is your body singing today?

is that song fast or slow?

angry or grateful?

energized like electronic music or exhausted like a slow bluegrass drawl?

Is a blues about what could have been or a love ballad sharing of bliss?

loud like metal, or soft like a lullaby?

complex like a 10-piece band or simple like solo acapella?

 

And

as the body sings

How are you listening?

are you paying attention, hearing the nuances, the phrasing of the notes?

are you hearing the pauses?

are you hearing the notes not played?

do you turn up or down the volume when the song is a cry for help?

 

Thus

move to the beautiful music that your body is singing today

        feel each 

                    note + pause + nuance + cry

                                as you have never felt them before

As you move today, whether for exercise or a break at work, listen in a way you haven't listened in awhile. And consider write your own piece today, starting with the line "If movement is the song of the body..."

Dear Freeman

Dear Freeman,

This letter is one of gratitude from one of your mentees.

For the last three decades, you have been the ultimate mentor for me, a guide in so many ways. Always there to support, willing to make time for me.

I heard the stories about you before I ever stepped on your University of Maryland Baltimore County (UMBC) campus that you led for three decades, a gem on the higher education landscape and one known for producing an incredible number of Black PhDs.

“There’s a college president there who will make visits to students’ houses and sit in the living room to try to encourage them to come to UMBC. Not because they are athletes, but because they are smart.”

You have always made being a nerd a cool thing to be!

We then had the privilege to work together in planning the UMBC Freedom Seder, an event stemming from the Civil Rights Movement that uses Passover to bring the Black and Jewish communities together through the theme of freedom. I heard that you supported the event, and expected to meet you in the ballroom on the day of the event. But here you were, at all of the planning meetings with a bunch of undergrad students like me. Deferring to us as if we were the Board of Regents.

A servant leader in all ways. Always.

Dr. Hrabowski, I must take a moment to brag on you. Is that okay?

As a little boy from Birmingham, Alabama, you were great at doing two things: eating and learning. You were pretty darn good at both, from what you have shared with me.

At 19 years old, you graduated from college (Hampton Institute) with high honors in mathematics and then became a PhD in math at age 24.

However, I think it was the moment where you had to decide whether or not to march with the children of Birmingham in the summer of 1963 to protest the injustices of segregation that might have been a turning point in your life. Given a task from Dr. King to look after the younger children who were in jail with you, you saw your potential as a leader. Just a few months after that, you bore witness to four of your classmates being killed in the bombing of the 16^th St. Baptist Church.

But you have never become bitter. Angry at injustice, yes. But you channel that in a loving way to the world.

No wonder there were calls for you to run for Governor of the State of Maryland or to leave UMBC for bigger schools.

I think a lot of my ways of being and doing stem from you. For instance, my insistence at looking at what people and communities do well, even though my medical profession focuses on the opposite. I look at two of the first books you penned, writing about successful young black men and women, wanting to dig into what factors made them achieve.

I am honored to be your student.

I am honored to carry on your legacy.

May your path continue to carry blessings. Enjoy every moment of retirement with Jackie and your grandson Elijah.

Thank you.

Ahe hee.

Ashe.

p.s. You now have a few more groupies to add to the LONG list thanks to this blog :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Writing to Heal friends and family - here is an 8-minute glimpse of Dr. Hrabowski, giving a closing speech at the 2025 American Conference on Education conference, offering us hope and perspective in this moment. Enjoy!

The World at our Table: How will we welcome them?

I took my seat in the makeshift meeting room around a big table, preparing to give a health talk to the refugees supported by Umoja. 

This organization was founded by Chantal Muhumure to empower refugee women, and is housed by St. Timothy’s church. Umoja (meaning “unity” in Swahili) offers vocational training, drivers education, English classes and health/wellness support.

On my side, the room continued to fill up with men, while a colleague prepared to speak to the women. Due to many of the attendees using public transportation, arriving on time was not as easy for them as it was for me, using my car.

Nothing was easy for these men, as I came to appreciate through their stories.

Introductions came first.

Countries around our table: Syria, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Venezuela, Guatemala, Rwanda, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo.

Languages spoken: Persian, Pashto, Arabic, Swahili, Kinyarwanda, Thai and Spanish.

Escaping from war and ethnic violence, each of these men had an incredible story of how they got to be here in New Mexico.

“We have the entire world at this table,” I reflected to them, as translators amongst us and Google translate did the work to get my message to each of them.

“What a beautiful thing, to look around this table and see how each of you have come to be here.”

I paused.

“I hope that our country shows you a welcome, a path toward being successful here, toward feeling a part of America.”

They shared openly and honestly about their fear in this moment. One shared that it was akin to being in someone’s house but fearing that the initial welcome wasn’t the reality. 

Unsure whether this country wants them or simply wants them deported.

The U.S. Refugee Resettlement Program, abruptly suspended in a matter of weeks. (Lawsuit challenging this was filed February 10^th.)

These men were years and even decades into working through programs and processes to get to right here, at this table.

And the door was slamming shut on the support we promised to provide.

I looked around the table again, a glimpse of “the world” right here at America’s doorstep.

Dreams and hopes of escaping violence and genocide. Dreams and hopes of being a part of the American fabric.

Turning inward, I felt a deep sadness in thinking about the “welcome” we are providing our refugees and immigrants.

Suddenly, my health talk didn’t seem all that important.

Run Your Race Today

As the day begins,

You lace up your shoes

Breathe deep

Give thanks

Toe the starting line

Off you go

Just run your race today

Letting go of other’s expectations or outside pressures

Run your race

At times you will be at full speed, sprinting like a child on the beach racing to water’s edge

At other times, you may slow to a trot, akin to kids’ speed when called to the kitchen to do the dishes

Just run your race today

Invite others to run alongside you; races of one aren't a whole lot of fun

Run your race

Give thanks for all that you are, perfectly you

Glow the radiance that is uniquely yours

Let your light shine, like the New Mexico sky

Smile big

Laugh lots

Play often

Run your race

Enjoy the journey, each and every step

A recent run (not race) with friends Dewayne, Chokri, Mike and Solomon under the gorgeous NM sky.

Antidotes for Fear

There is a lot of fear in the air.

In my personal sphere, my middle schooler came home telling me they spent a lesson on what Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) does and knowing their Constitutional rights if approached.

My father, a career public servant with the National Institutes of Health (NIH) suddenly lives in a land where science and those who make the science are threatened and thwarted.

A physician colleague shared that their clinic’s staff meeting was consumed with what to do if ICE shows up at their front door.

A community activist colleague texted me frantically, that same day, “I am hearing reports that ICE is currently at your hospital. Can you confirm this?”

Even our land’s original citizens have not been spared. The Navajo Nation sent out a warning for their citizens, reporting that some have already been wrongly detained when they cannot provide documentation of who they are. In the press release:

“Despite possessing Certificates of Indian Blood (CIBs) and state-issued IDs, several individuals have been detained or questioned by ICE agents who do not recognize these documents as valid proof of citizenship.”

My wife, a Dine’ (Navajo) woman lies in bed worrying about what she would do if confronted, and whether or not she would be believed, knowing full well the history of violence and erasure this country has inflicted on her people.

As a physician, I am deeply saddened to see all of this. I know this is an unhealthy situation that is causing needless harm.

As a citizen, I am saddened but not surprised to see where our mis-guided leaders are trying to take us. Fear has a tight grip on them and they are reacting by passing along their fear to the rest of us. (It doesn’t hurt that fear is also a really effective way to get votes)

So, what do we do? What can we do?

I have five thoughts to share on this.

#1 – Connect

We must find ways to connect to Life, as fear strives to disconnect us from the land, from one another, and from Creator. I ask myself, “Will I spend more time in fear or in gratitude today?” Ultimately, each of us determines that answer for ourselves.

#2 – Talk with others

Talk about how you are feeling with those around you. Not on social media, but real in-person conversations to share and empathize. With each of these conversations, fear recedes a bit further.

#3 – Consume news in small amounts

Be mindful of how much news you consume in this moment, knowing that all media, far left to far right, thrives on fear. Keep informed, yes. But in small doses that are compatible with your wellness.

#4 – Fill your airwaves with hope, love, humor, etc.

As the complement to #3, we need to put the opposite of fear into our earbuds and personal airwaves. What books, for instance, remind you of your deepest ideals? A great time to pick them up, dust them off, and read them for a ump-teenth time. A book of Mother Teresa quotes and another on undoing racism are ones by my bedside at the moment. But if Calvin and Hobbs or Trevor Noah are more what you are needing, going the way of humor is never a bad decision either.

#5 – Serve others

Reach beyond your comfort zone to those who are our neighbors, those who are in need of love and clothes and a warm cup of soup. In opening our arms to those around us, we subdue and defeat fear. Do something radical this week, out of the norm for yourself, to reach out and serve someone, maybe a complete stranger. It is impossible, I have found, to be fearful in moments where I am in service to others.

~~~~~~~~

Thank you for allowing me to share. I feel the fear diminishing already, as I think about where to place my energies today.

I will close with a beautiful quote by the late Civil Rights leader and US Congressman John Lewis, as I practice #4 above, listening to those guiding lights in my life:

“There is an old African proverb, ‘When you pray, move your feet.’ 

As a nation if we care for the Beloved Community, we must move

our feet,

our hands,

our hearts,

our resources

to build and not to tear down,

to reconcile and not to divide,

to love and not to hate,

to heal and not to kill.” 

Book #2 is on its way!

We began talking about making an audiobook version of the first book. 

We even started recording a few of the pieces. But my heart wasn’t into it. These were pieces from the early days and weeks and months of the pandemic. 

Reading them now didn’t seem all that exciting. And if I wasn’t that excited about them, how was I going to get others excited to listen to them?

Deep breath.

But, what if we used this momentum to work on a 2^nd book, one with new material and a chance to take Writing to Heal in some new directions? And with an audiobook version as well.

With that pivot, this project of book #2, Writing to Heal: The Journey Continues began. 

Today, we share the front cover with you all, with art by Crystal Daghaa'ii. She and her family has been my family since I arrived in Tuba City 23 years ago. and I am excited to highlight her work in this book, both with the cover and with pieces within the book. 

There are two other artists featured in the book – Mallery Quetawki (who did the front cover for book #1) and Lindsey Hancock. Art is alive and well in Writing to Heal: The Journey Continues.

I will spin this into a useable nugget for my wonderful readers: when life gives you one of these moments, even this week, turn the dead-end into a new opportunity. 

When your heart is telling you a project is not worth pursuing, take that deep breath and realize that far from a dead-end, there are lots of exit ramps and turn-offs in front of you. Lots of options of where to turn. And don’t underestimate the importance of momentum, of already being in motion toward something. In my case, we harnessed the fact that we were already moving toward a new project to fuel the new book.

Pre-Sales of Writing to Heal: The Journey Continues are available through Community Publishing for $20. Click here

For those audiobook fans, we will release the audiobook version in the next months.

Spelling Bee Inspiration for the New Year

Hi good people.

A new year is here.

It even feels like winter today in the 505.

So, what should we talk about today?

Something random?

Something inspirational?

Something both random and inspirational?

So….

I was asked to serve as a judge for an elementary school spelling bee recently. It checked off something that had been on my bucket list for years, so I decided to say yes.

The school library was transformed into a spelling bee space. Announcer on a sound system. Nervous students with their nervous parents seated behind them as a studio audience. And a list of official do’s and don’ts to conform to the Scripps National Spelling Bee rules. “If you rub your nose to the right, and only do it once, that won’t disqualify you. However, if you rub it more than once, rub to the left, or pick it…”

The wonderful little ones came up one by one and spelled their words. Some words obscure and obsolete. Others that intimidated me (e.g. ones longer than four letters). Luckily for me, I had a cheat sheet or I might have been in trouble in the later rounds.

When they got a word right, they went back to their seats. If they missed the word, they went to sit in a group of chairs on the side.

Eventually, one speller remained.

Confetti letters showered down from the ceiling.

The ESPN reporter rushed in to get a post-game interview.

Parents googled words like “acquiesce” and “fuchsia” on their phones to see if their child was erroneously exited from the competition.

Here’s the inspiration part, my friends.

The kids in this spelling bee walked into the room knowing that their chances of winning were slim. If they were really advanced in elementary math, they might have figured out it was about 5%.

Many of us walk the other way when presented with a challenge that gives us a 5% chance of winning. We think about the 95% chance that we will lose and say “no thanks”.

Today, this week, this month, and this year, may we be courageous in accepting challenges. May we challenge the math and instead see a 100% chance of growth in the spelling bee opportunities that 2025 presents.

Just don’t make the mistake of rubbing your nose the wrong way.